ode to uhaul

uhaul, oh, uhaul, you make me so angry i feel nauseated

it’s not the 100 degree weather in which i hauled my own boxes

nor the smell of the cab

it’s not the 8 foot high stack looming into the sky

nor the fridge to clean out as i leave and the fridge to clean out when i arrive

it’s u, uhaul

you suck, and make me so angry i feel nauseated

you overbook your trucks and blame your customers for your mistakes

you threaten and yell

you pit customers against each other and lay blame when it is only due to u


you suck

uhaul, oh, uhaul i should have stuck to my declaration of 7 years ago

next time, oh, next time, i will

no uhaul for me

ever again

and, if i have my way, no uhaul for any of my friends, strangers i run into, or other innocent who needs a truck in which to haul their lives

uhaul, oh, uhaul, never again

One thought on “ode to uhaul

  1. That happened when I left Chicago. I had a reservation for a trailer for my car, and the move had to happen that day. Arrived to pick it up, and they were out – but “there might be one left at this other store…” It was explained to me that what they call a reservation on their website is actually just a “request” and you can’t really RESERVE the equipment. Unbelievable.

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